Couples Therapy in Scottsdale, AZ
Tired of having the same fight over and over?
Couples therapy in person in Scottsdale, AZ, and online throughout AZ, CO, NV, & FL.
When Every Conversation Turns Into Another Argument
You love each other, but lately it feels like you're stuck in the same frustrating patterns. Conversations turn into arguments, small issues become big fights, and somehow you both end up feeling misunderstood. Maybe one of you shuts down while the other keeps pushing for a resolution. Or maybe you don’t fight at all because you've started avoiding certain conversations altogether, because you know how stressful they'll become.
I help couples understand what's happening beneath those conflicts, communicate more effectively, and find ways to break the cycle of repeated arguments or avoidance. My approach is direct, practical, and tailored to your relationship—including when ADHD, autism, trauma, or different communication styles are part of the picture.
How I Approach Couples Therapy
Couples therapy isn't just about learning to communicate better. It's about understanding why you keep getting stuck in the same patterns, even when you both want things to be different. Whether you tend to shut down, explain, argue, walk away, or blame yourself, it’s important to recognize how each partner typically responds during conflict so we can work on making adjustments.
I take an active, direct approach to couples therapy. I’m not going to let you argue the way you do at home, because that’s not productive. I help you identify what's happening between you, understand each other's perspectives, and practice different ways of responding.
We also look at the factors that may be contributing to your relationship difficulties, including past experiences, emotional needs, and differences in how you process information or communicate.
Couples Therapy for Neurodiverse Relationships
When ADHD, autism, or other neurodivergent traits are part of a relationship, couples can find themselves struggling with differences that traditional relationship advice doesn't always address.
One partner might need time to process a conversation while the other wants to resolve things immediately. Differences in communication, emotional regulation, sensory needs, or executive functioning can lead to misunderstandings, frustration, and resentment—even when both partners have good intentions.
I work with neurodiverse couples to better understand how each partner experiences the relationship, recognize where their differences create challenges, and develop strategies that work for both people. The goal isn't to make either partner think or behave like the other. It's to find ways to navigate those differences while strengthening the relationship.
What to Expect From Couples Therapy
We start by talking about what brings you to therapy, what's working in your relationship, what's not, and what each of you hopes will change. I want to hear both perspectives and understand how you've gotten to where you are today.
Then we dive right into identifying the patterns that contribute to conflict or disconnection and figure out what needs to change. I'll help you recognize those patterns as they're happening and work on responding differently, both during sessions and at home.
Couples therapy requires participation from both partners. I'll provide guidance, feedback, and practical strategies, but meaningful progress also involves being willing to look at your own behavior and make changes outside our sessions. Rather than focusing on who's to blame, we'll look at how you respond to each other, what drives those reactions, and what needs to change to break the cycle. Regardless of how the conflict started, the pattern you've fallen into isn't working for either of you. So let’s change that.
Meet Your Couples Therapist
I'm Lianna Purjes, a Licensed Clinical Social Worker with nearly 20 years of experience helping people navigate relationships, emotional challenges, and major life transitions.
I specialize in working with couples, including neurodiverse couples, and bring an understanding of how ADHD, autism, trauma, and past experiences can influence relationship dynamics.
My style is direct, compassionate, and practical. I won't just sit back and listen while you repeat the same arguments. I'll help you understand what's happening, challenge unhelpful patterns, and work toward meaningful changes.
Other Ways I Work With Couples
Not every couple needs traditional weekly therapy. Depending on where you are in your relationship and what you're hoping to accomplish, one of these options might be a better fit.
Couples Therapy Intensives
Sometimes an hour a week just doesn't feel like enough. My one- and two-day couples therapy intensives give you dedicated time to dig deeper into relationship challenges, understand what's keeping you stuck, and work toward meaningful changes without having to stop just when you're getting somewhere.
Discernment Counseling
What happens when one partner is considering ending the relationship and the other wants to save it? Discernment counseling is designed specifically for couples in this situation. Rather than jumping into traditional couples therapy, we'll focus on helping you gain clarity and confidence about what comes next.
Frequently Asked Questions About Couples Therapy
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Couples therapy sessions are $200 for 50 minutes. I offer a free consultation so we can discuss your concerns and determine whether working together would be a good fit.
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I don't accept insurance directly, but I can provide a superbill that you can submit to your insurance company for possible out-of-network reimbursement. I also partner with Reimbursify, a service that makes submitting out-of-network claims easier.
Reimbursement depends on your insurance plan and whether couples therapy is covered, so I recommend checking your benefits before starting.
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You don't have to be on the verge of breaking up to benefit from couples therapy. Maybe you're having the same arguments over and over, feeling disconnected, struggling with trust, or avoiding difficult conversations because they never seem to go well.
Some couples come to therapy because of a specific issue, while others simply recognize that their relationship isn't where they want it to be. You don't have to wait until things get worse to ask for help.
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Yes. In fact, recurring arguments are one of the most common reasons couples seek therapy. You might fight about money, household responsibilities, intimacy, or seemingly small things that turn into much bigger disagreements.
Often, the issue isn't just what you're arguing about, but the pattern you fall into when conflict happens. Couples therapy can help you recognize those patterns, understand what's driving them, and learn how to handle disagreements differently.
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Absolutely. When ADHD, autism, or other neurodivergent traits are part of a relationship, differences in communication, emotional regulation, executive functioning, and sensory needs can create challenges that aren't always addressed by traditional relationship advice.
I specialize in working with neurodiverse couples and help partners better understand their differences without assuming that one person's way of thinking or communicating is wrong. Together, we work on strategies that take both partners' needs into account.
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generally recommend starting with weekly couples therapy sessions. Meeting consistently helps us build momentum, identify relationship patterns, and begin practicing different ways of responding to each other.
As you make progress, we can discuss whether it makes sense to reduce the frequency of sessions. Every couple is different, so we'll make those decisions based on your relationship and goals.
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Yes. I offer online couples therapy throughout Arizona, as well as Colorado, Florida, and Nevada. I also see couples in person at my Scottsdale office.
Online couples therapy allows you and your partner to work on your relationship without having to travel to an office. Sessions are conducted through a secure video platform, and we can use many of the same approaches and strategies that I use in person.
Ready to Make Some Changes in Your Relationship?
You don't have to keep having the same arguments or avoiding the conversations that matter. If you're ready to understand what's keeping you stuck and start doing things differently, let's talk.
Schedule a free consultation to discuss what's happening in your relationship, ask questions, and see whether couples therapy with me would be a good fit.