Therapy For Adult Children of Dysfunctional Families
Complex Trauma Treatment In-Person in Scottsdale, AZ, and Online in AZ, CO, and FL
You’re not damaged—you survived what others didn’t see.
You grew up walking on eggshells—never knowing if today would be calm or chaotic, if love meant connection or control. Now, as an adult, relationships feel just as confusing. You might find yourself constantly people-pleasing, afraid to upset anyone. Or pulling people close, only to push them away again the second you feel too exposed. You crave intimacy but feel unsafe when it shows up. And underneath it all is a constant hum of shame, the belief that something is fundamentally wrong with you.
If this sounds familiar, you're not alone—and you're not beyond help. These patterns didn’t come from nowhere. They’re often rooted in something called complex PTSD, or C-PTSD. At Fuzzy Socks Therapy, we help adults untangle these deeply ingrained patterns and begin to feel safe, connected, and whole—for perhaps the first time.
What is Complex PTSD?
Complex PTSD, or C-PTSD, develops in response to long-term, repeated trauma—often during childhood. Unlike PTSD, which can stem from a single traumatic event, such as a car accident, C-PTSD is the result of living in an environment where you had to constantly adapt to emotional neglect, abuse, manipulation, or unpredictability. It can form in homes affected by addiction, mental illness, narcissism, or simply emotional immaturity.
People with C-PTSD don’t always recognize their symptoms as trauma. Instead, they think they’re “too sensitive” or “too much.” They may have even been told those exact things growing up. They may struggle with low self-worth, chronic guilt, and difficulty trusting others. But these are survival strategies—ways your brain and body adapted to keep you safe. Therapy can help you begin to unlearn these patterns and build new ways of relating to yourself and others.
Symptoms of Complex PTSD
Living with C-PTSD can feel like you're constantly on alert, waiting for something to go wrong. You may also notice a deep fear of abandonment and overwhelming shame that colors your relationships. These experiences aren’t “just anxiety” or “just insecurity”—they’re trauma responses.
Here are some common symptoms of complex PTSD:
People-pleasing to avoid conflict or rejection
A visceral fear of disappointing authority figures
A push-pull dynamic in relationships: craving closeness, then doing something (consciously or unconsciously) to push people away because it feels so uncomfortable
Feeling numb or disconnected from your emotions
Persistent guilt, shame, or feeling “broken”
Difficulty trusting others, or yourself
Hypervigilance or always feeling on edge
Trouble setting or respecting boundaries
Oversharing personal information with people you barely know
Internalized self-blame and harsh inner criticism
Chronic anxiety or depression that hasn’t improved with standard therapy
These factors often result in people struggling in their adult relationships with family, friends, and romantic partners. People with complex trauma can even find that they struggle at work, feeling triggered by unjust outcomes or constantly worrying about disappointing their boss. A lot of people tell themselves that what they experienced wasn’t “too bad” compared to what others go through. The truth is, some of the hardest wounds to heal from aren’t necessarily physical—they’re emotional. When you grow up not knowing if you can go to your primary caregiver for comfort, that leaves a lasting imprint on your mental health.
Why Might Someone Seek Therapy for Complex Trauma?
When you grow up in a home where emotional chaos, neglect, or unpredictability was the norm, you learn early on to abandon yourself in order to keep the peace. You learn to read every room, take care of everyone else’s needs, and silence your own. Over time, these survival skills become automatic—even when they’re no longer serving you.
You might find yourself constantly people-pleasing, struggling to speak up, or feeling guilty anytime you try to set a boundary. Maybe you attach quickly in relationships, hoping this time you’ll feel safe, only to end up disappointed or rejected. Or maybe you’ve been told you’re “too emotional,” “too needy,” or “too much”—and deep down, you worry they’re right.
It’s not that you’re broken. It’s that your nervous system was shaped by chronic relational stress. The fear of being abandoned, the anger that bubbles up without warning, the loneliness you carry even when you’re surrounded by people—these are all echoes of unmet needs and emotional wounds from the past.
You may have already tried therapy before, or self-help books, or support groups, and still feel stuck in the same cycles. That’s because most approaches don’t always address the deeper patterns rooted in complex trauma—like why you ignore red flags, why you can’t stop rescuing others, or why being alone feels unbearable.
Therapy for complex trauma offers something different: a place to explore how your past shaped your present, and how to build a future where you finally feel emotionally safe, worthy, and connected.
Is Complex Trauma Therapy Right for You?
Wanting answers is a sign of your resilience. Many clients come to us unsure if what they experienced “counts” as trauma. The truth is, if your nervous system still feels unsafe—even years later—then therapy can help. Here are some frequently asked questions:
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Many people who grew up in dysfunctional families find they have a tendency to people-please, being attracted to emotionally unavailable people, and feel lonely even when they’re not alone. This is rooted in attachment theory, which tells us that kids who don’t get their emotional needs met by their primary caregivers tend to grow up to struggle with trust and emotional intimacy as adults.
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There are no “rules” when it comes to a dysfunctional family. That’s often what makes growing up in a dysfunctional family so traumatic. Humans (especially kids) need consistency to feel safe. When there are no rules, or when the rules suddenly change day to day or moment to moment, kids feel confused and disoriented.
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PTSD usually follows a single traumatic event, like being mugged, while C-PTSD comes from ongoing, relational trauma—often in childhood. C-PTSD tends to involve deep emotional wounds, identity confusion, and relational struggles.
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Unfortunately, there is no one tell-tale sign, and we can’t measure this the way we measure cholesterol levels in a blood test. If you’re wondering if you grew up in a dysfunctional family, that’s probably a good sign that you might have. The dysfunction itself can be rooted in addiction issues, abuse, neglect, fear of disappointing your parents, or a host of other factors.
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There are 4 attachment styles that fall into one of two general categories: secure attachment or insecure attachment. Kids who grew up in dysfunctional families generally develop some sort of insecure attachment style, but this isn’t always the case. A lot depends on other factors, such as other trusted adults you had in your life, going to therapy, etc.
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Many neglected children develop one of three types of insecure attachment. As more research comes out on attachment, there may be correlations found between neglect and one specific attachment style, but a lot depends on the individual as well. Just like some kids react to stress by hiding in a closet and some react by throwing their toys, some kids develop one attachment style over another.
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Yes. Emotional neglect, enmeshment, parentification, or inconsistent caregiving can all cause complex trauma, even if you don’t remember specific “bad” events.
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No. We go at your pace. The goal is to help you feel safe in your body and mind—gradually building trust in the process, and in yourself.
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Healing from C-PTSD is not a quick fix. But with the right support, many people begin to feel real relief and shift deeply rooted patterns within months. We’ll walk that path together.
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That’s completely ok! Memory issues are very common in people who have experienced trauma. You don’t need to remember specific details (or much of anything) about what happened in order to heal from it. Trauma-specific therapies, like EMDR, work by accessing a part of your brain that holds emotions but doesn’t require conscious memories of specific events.
Counseling Can Help You Heal From Complex PTSD
You may feel like you’re too damaged, too complicated, or too “stuck” to change. That belief? It’s part of the trauma, too. Therapy can help you untangle those old stories, reconnect with your emotions, and begin building relationships that don’t come with fear or shame.
At Fuzzy Socks Therapy, our skilled trauma therapists understand the quiet grief of growing up without the emotional safety every child deserves. We also know how to create a therapeutic relationship that feels different—where you’re truly seen, never judged, and always in charge of your healing journey.
The Fuzzy Socks Therapy Approach to Complex PTSD
We specialize in working with adults who grew up in dysfunctional, chaotic, or emotionally neglectful families. Our approach is trauma-informed, neurodivergent-affirming, and rooted in compassion. We use a mix of evidence-based modalities like Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), and attachment-focused therapies like Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) to help you understand how the past shaped you—and how to finally move forward.
We don’t just focus on symptoms. We help you build self-trust, deepen your sense of identity, and learn what real safety feels like—internally and in relationships. This is deeper work, but it’s also the work that creates lasting change.
You Want to Learn More About Complex PTSD Therapy
We understand how confusing and overwhelming it can feel to figure out if therapy is right for you. Here are some questions we often hear:
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Not unless you want to. We’ll focus on what’s showing up in your life now and explore the past only when it feels helpful and safe.
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If your previous therapy didn’t address trauma or relational wounds, it may not have gone deep enough. Our work focuses on the root causes, not just surface behaviors.
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Sometimes, yes. The goal of therapy is to help the client heal and gain insight through the exploration of emotions and experiences. In general, the therapist’s role is to help facilitate that process by providing a safe emotional environment for exploration and a different perspective. So I’d always rather have you make your own decisions about your life rather than me telling you what to do. That being said, I’m also not a therapist who always defaults to “what do you think about that?” If you need more direction, I’m happy to provide it.
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That’s okay. Therapy moves at your pace. Just showing up is enough to start.
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That’s okay! It happens all the time in trauma therapy because we’re opening up some old wounds. And the reality is, you getting emotional in session is fantastic! Okay, granted, it doesn’t feel great in the moment, but it tells us that healing is happening. My role, as the therapist, is to hold your hand through the process and help you regulate your emotions before the end of the session so you walk out of therapy being able to continue on with your day.
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Yes! For some clients, therapy starts with identifying their patterns, but some clients come in already knowing them. Therapy can help you figure out ways to stop engaging in those patterns and work toward building healthier relationships with yourself and others.
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There are many characteristics of family dynamics that can create a dysfunctional environment: addiction, domestic violence, parents who dismiss a child’s feelings and/or needs for emotional comfort, living in a home with caregivers who are often yelling/arguing, etc.
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This is a very tough and complex question. Just like any other boundary, it all depends on your situation and how you feel. Regardless of what you decide, this is a decision that deserves some serious thought and time before cutting ties, and it’s something that can be processed in therapy.
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As an adult, you get to make decisions for what your life looks like, including how much or little contact you have with your family. Therapy can help you explore and determine what boundaries might be helpful to set. That could look like only discussing more surface level topics with family members or staying in a hotel over the holidays rather than staying in your family’s home so you have some space. Regardless of what you decide, the point here is to figure out what you’re okay with and what you’re not okay with.
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Uninvolved parenting often leads to a person developing some sort of insecure attachment style. We don’t always know why one person develops one attachment style and someone else develops another. And when it comes to insecure attachment, there’s no one style that is “better” or “worse” than another–they’re all just something to be aware of and work on.
How Therapy Can Help Adults From Dysfunctional Families
Therapy can help you:
Heal the wounds you have from the trauma you’ve experienced
Know (both cognitively and emotionally) that you didn’t do anything to deserve what happened
Develop healthy coping strategies to deal with the negative feelings that come up in your day-to-day life
Learn how to say no when you don’t want to do something
Improve your relationships with family, friends, colleagues, and most importantly, yourself
Recognize red flags in relationships before diving in
Be able to be alone for a while without spiraling into an emotional tornado of loneliness and despair
You don’t want your past to keep getting in the way of your future. You want to walk down the street and not panic when you notice things that trigger you. You want to feel safe and connected with people in your life. You want to know that you can handle the little everyday stresses that come up in life without completely shutting down. You want to have healthy relationships with emotionally healthy people.
Imagine this…
You stop constantly worrying or waiting for something bad to happen—you can finally relax and enjoy the moment.
You feel more comfortable being yourself, and you no longer feel like an outsider in every room you walk into.
Your mind isn’t racing all the time anymore—you’re sleeping better, thinking more clearly, and able to focus on what’s in front of you.
You actually have the energy to get things done—whether it’s going to the grocery store, calling a friend, or starting that project you’ve been putting off.
You’ve started saying no when you mean no—and you’re carving out real time for yourself without feeling selfish about it.
You’re noticing red flags earlier, walking away from unhealthy relationships, and building stronger ones with people who respect and support you.
You feel understood in therapy—your therapist actually talks with you, helps you make connections, and gives you tools you can use in real life.
You finally know what to do when you’re triggered—you’ve got clear strategies to calm your nervous system, set boundaries, and respond in ways you feel proud of.
How Therapy for Complex Trauma Works
In-depth assessment. I get to know you, your history, your wants, your needs, and your goals for therapy. I also get to know your challenges. So, for example, if closing your eyes gives you a sense of panic, I won’t ask you to close your eyes to imagine something.
We carve out a plan for treatment. This can be a combination of talk therapy, EMDR, DBT, mindfulness, EFT, somatic interventions, and others. The treatment is tailored specifically to you, not based on whatever the latest therapy fad is at the moment.
We see each other for therapy. I typically recommend weekly sessions to start, but this can vary depending on your needs. We can meet in my office in Scottsdale or online from the comfort of your home.
We do regular check-ins to make sure treatment is working for your needs. I want you to know that you can tell me when things aren’t working for you so we can make adjustments. It’s not about my agenda…it’s about yours.
As you begin to improve and notice less distress in your everyday life, we taper down. This usually looks like spacing sessions out to every other week or once a month. Though some clients choose to end treatment outright, which is also completely fine, most clients find it most helpful to gradually phase out. Either way, my goal is to work myself out of a job!
Begin Therapy for Complex Trauma in Adults in Scottsdale, AZ
You don’t have to keep repeating the same painful patterns in your relationships. Therapy can help you understand where they came from—and begin writing a new story. At her Scottsdale therapy practice, Lianna is an experienced therapist who specializes in complex trauma. To get started:
Contact us to schedule your appointment or book a free consultation here
Meet with Lianna, trauma therapist
Start healing your past and reclaiming your future!
Additional Services Offered at Fuzzy Socks Therapy
Therapy for complex trauma isn’t the only service we offer in our Scottsdale, AZ, office. We know you may be looking for other services that aren’t trauma therapy. Other therapy services at Fuzzy Socks Therapy include therapy for children and adolescents, neurodivergence therapy, discernment counseling for couples who aren’t sure if they want to stay together or split up, social skills groups for kids and teens, and neurodivergent parent coaching. For more on therapy for complex trauma and my other services, check out my Blog!
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